I loathe having even to write up a scouting report on Caveman, in the event the Lakers somehow sign him, because it will absolutely be filled with scathing reviews. To be honest with you, I can't even see why the Lakers want this guy--the best complement to Pau would be an excellent defending, rebounding type to bring toughness to the frontcourt. We don't need any more floor spacers there. D'Antoni's obsession with this is alarming.
Caveman's numbers look superficially good at first glance, but everything is smoke and mirrors here. Yes, he can score--he ranked 6th out of 54th centers in scoring rate--but do we need scoring at the expense of almost everything else. Kaman's scoring is even horrid because he's so reminiscent of Michael Doleac--he has no at-rim game--he's 49th out of 54 centers in taking shots directly at the rim, 51st at drawing fouls, 40th at offensive rebound rate. Not to mention he's woefully unathletic--only five centers dunk less than he does when they see the rim. He doesn't pass the ball well either--42nd in assist rate. All he does on offense well is knowing how to get open (5th in usage rate) and hit jumpers--in fact, among centers, he's fourth best. He takes a lot from no-man's land (10-15 ft) and also long mid-range J's, and while not bad from 10-15, he really, really excels at the long mid-range J's (4th among 54 centers). But with zero inside game, which is by far the easiest way to generate points, and therefore zero foul drawing, he isn't very efficient even shooting 50% from the field. The mid-range J is BY FAR the worst shot of the game. If he had some passing, maybe he could help a few matters...but he has none. By hogging the ball so much with average efficiency and no passing, it's no wonder that he could possibly be making teams worse on offense. Just subliminally (like the "Jason Kapono" effect--we call it mid-range destruction).
Kaman's just awful on defense--he's subpar in contesting shots. He got overpowered at the rim frequently last year--he was 14th of 16th players in Dallas last year in contesting shots directly at the rim but relatively average everywhere else, with zero areas with any potential whatsoever. In addition, he has rapidly lost his superficial shotblocking ability along with much of his athleticism, and you'd think with he'd realize it and start attempting to draw charges, which he doesn't do at all--as a result, he's 36th among 54 centers in defensive plays, subpar. He's an average defensive rebounder, but overall a poor rebounder, and he's one of 34 NBA players to have no athleticism and no defense, which really isn't a good place to be. Rick Carlisle had a lot of players who put up superficial numbers in his Dallas team last year, but as smart coach, he realized it and cut back a lot of their minutes--Kaman was one of them, as he only played 20 minutes a game.
Injuries are also a major concern--he's missed 86 games over the past three seasons, which clearly has had an effect in his rapidly declining athleticism--he has virtually zero athletic markers, with declining at-rim game, shotblocking, defensive playmaking, and free throw rates. With no defense he's pretty much became a high usage mid-range jumpshooting specialist, but with zero passing and no at-rim game he's had a poor net effect offensively as well. It's hard to believe he'd be useful in any capacity because he has a poor effect offensively and a horrendous effect defensively. It's Michael Doleac all over again. On top of all the injuries, one wonders if he's even worth a roster spot.
Okay, that's my scouting report. I'll steal this one if we do sign him.