1. The Great One coming to camp in pristine shape, with no visible injuries save for his retractable pinkie finger. Having just won a championship, Kobe comes to camp still giddy, with more wisdom muscle, and desire to win his 5th championship. I know this goes without saying, because Kobe is "The Great One, but words can't describe how it feels to see Kobe injury-free, and just doing his thing...(The league is going to be sorry once he's gone. I know he's not going anywhere anytime soon, but the Kobe-Haters just amaze me.)
2. Andrew Bynum comes to camp looking mean and burly after spending the summer in Dwight Howard's pool house. The summer days in Orlando along with the other-worldly training sessions with the modern day Juggernaut(Howard) have been good to Bynum. He comes to camp looking more chiseled than he ever has, and declaring that he will definitely be an all-star this upcoming season.
3. Pau Gasol fully recovered from his broken finger. While practicing with his native countrymen, Pau injured himself. The Lakers were pissed, and sent Gary Vitti to "check up on him". However Pau evokes a collective sigh of relief when he shows up fully healed and rested, and with a haircut.
4. Jordan Farmar comes to camp ready to take the next step. Like Neo being able to see all of the excess green-coding in the Matrix, Jordan finally "gets it". He storms into camp on a personal mission. He's in tip top shape, and even jokes around that he's going to start permanently by the end of training camp. After making his brazen proclamation, he winks at Phil Jackson with his left eye, and then winks at Derek Fisher with his right eye. The Great One smiles from ear to ear....
5. Phil is able to move about without resorting to some Stephen Hawking device. It's evident that Phil's motor skills are declining, however he musters the strength to walk unaided, and looks better than he has since the 2004 meltdown. About this summer he mentions spending quality time at Jeannie Buss' yoga parlor and discovering Pineapple Express has regenerative properties the likes of which he can't explain.
6. Ron Artest declares that for every home game he'll have an even more fantastic hair cut. For their Christmas game, he promises to have a brand new fade, complete with green & red hair and working Christmas lights.
7. Luke Walton is praised for honing his skills this summer. By a stroke of miracle, Luke Walton's jumper has become more consistent. At one point, he's seen drilling 15 straight 3 pointers. He then proceeds to beat Kobe in suicides and he even performs his own break dancing session while playing Afrika Baambaata's Planet Rock Album.
8. Adam Morrison arrives to camp with a whole different demeanor. Out of knowhere Adam starts playing "I'm Coming Out", by Diana Ross through his stereo. He tells Phil that this is the year he goes from a boy to a man...Phil nods in affirmation and then tells Adam to turn his G-d Dam---d music down so he can medidate.
9. Smush Parker received a mysterious invite to camp. When he arrives at the Lakers compound, he's greeted by non-other than the Great One. Shortly there-after, Smush is never seen again...Upon being investigated, Kobe pleads his infinite 5th amendment privilege.
10. Sasha comes to camp and tells the world that the "Machine is back". He insists that he's worked on his shooting all summer long. At one point in the interview, Sasha is called over by Phil Jackson, to which Sasha tells the media, "I'll be back..."
"That's what I'm talkin' about. You come into our house, you should get your behind kicked. You don't come into the OB playing that stuff....You can't come over to our place talking noise like that. You'll get your butt beat. I was about to go down the elevator to get in that thing....."
-Lamar Thomas, former NFL color commentator