KOBE KOBE KOBE!!!
Alonzo, winning the DPOY:"I thank my teammates for letting their men blow by them."
Shaq:"I made a 1,600 minus 800 minus 200 on the SAT, so I'm very intelligent when I speak."
Chick Hearn:"The game's in the refrigerator. The door's closed, the light's out, the eggs are cooling, the butter's getting hard, and the Jell-O's jiggling."